Running Away from Destiny

Saw a news report in the newspaper today about a man was hit by a motorcyclist and unfortunately he could not be saved. Since Penang is a very small island, word gets around pretty fast. According to what I have heard, this man was afraid of cars - I do not mean he has a phobia whenever a car is present, but he is afraid of car accidents that might happen to him or his family. So he never got his driving license because he never went to one and he does not allow his family to learn how to drive. Everywhere he went, he either took a cab or a bus. The ironic thing is that, what he was afraid of in the beginning and what he was trying to avoid, he still couldn't run away from his fate. It is a rather depressing situation.

It did, however, showed me one thing and that is to get over myself. What do I mean by that? What I am trying to express here is that there is a thousand things in the world that I could be afraid of, if I do not get over this fear, it is going to hold me back. My brother always said that I like to find excuses and put the blame on others but myself. Well... I hate to admit it but it is true. I guess by putting the blame on others makes one feel that he or she is in a way, good or better than anyone else and that you are not in the wrong. Nobody likes to be wrong. Nobody. But being scared to be in a guilty position, doesn't mean that I can get away with it by blaming others. I think I finally get it now. I've been so negative with the things around me and I have never bothered about my own weaknesses. Without dealing with any of it, I will still remain in my own circle, in a similar sense like the man I mentioned earlier. Whatever that you cannot overcome, that whatever will always be there and will continue to haunt you throughout your life. It is rather frightening, isn't it? I do hope I won't end up like this and I hope I will learn....

The Art of Talking

Sigh... It is official, communicating is definitely hard. It's often funny when I think about it, how stupid I can act over a small misunderstanding. Sometimes there are people who are willing to lend a helping hand, but they would never really say those words. Most of the time, they would say it indirectly and that would frequently lead to a whole lot of misunderstandings as well as unnecessary actions. I would always wonder to myself, 'Why do I get so easily irritated over the small matters?' Maybe this is it. By not fully paying attention to one's speaking and also having a mind that continually likes to jump into conclusion, does make life difficult and sometimes unbearable.

It is strange that when you talk about absolutely nothing, pure nonsense, it can be fun. When you say nothing at all, it can be fun too. However, the moment you try to have a good and meaningful conversation, it's becomes a challenge. This is hard as you are trying to express what you are thinking and deliever as clearly as possible to avoid any misinterpretation. I figured that is why people waste a lot of time in explanations. There is a wise one will always make me think of a reason for each action that I take or about to take. That is something I will always try neglect it as I find it too troublesome and hard to get by, though that wise one had his reasons. But I prefer to live my life as written as the following statement "No need to worry about everything I’ve done, live every second like it was my last one."

Communication may play a major part in life but it is nice to keep quiet once in a while and enjoy what surrounds you and what you have beside you. I find that environment and appearance speaks louder and clearer than a million words that come out from a single mouth.

Outburst!

I can't believe I let one idiotic message get to me. The nerve of that guy~! I feel like slapping him on the face. Said that I can't read?? Apparently he's got problem with his eyes, as he misread my message, understood the wrong way and insulted me! HUH~! But you know what, think whatever you want or choose what you want to believe, I don't give a damn and I don't freaking care. You don't even know me, pathetic jerk! Geramnya~!

*a deep breath* Ahhh... that feels much better. Glad that is over and done with!

Backstreet's Back All RIGHT!

Yeah... I still love them. Can't help it, they are one of the first few groups I started listen to when I was young. Though missing one member, they still sing great.

I spent the night watching through all the music videos they had made... Boy, it do brings back memories~ Their very first single, We've Got it Going On to the latest single, Inconsolable. I suddenly feel like a very little girl now... :P Been constantly playing Inconsolable over and over again on my Walkman phone. Yes, the Backstreet Boys are definitely back! I spent the night looking through all the music videos they had made throughout the years. Gosh.. They are no longer boys... they are MEN. I gotta listen to their previous album soon~ :D